Power of security
First, let’s look at the definition of sense of security in dictionary, a feeling of confidence and safety.
Lately, my friends and I talked about how we are often scared of making decisions when it comes to taking big steps in life. I think it all boils down to how much security we have at that moment in life. If we feel secure enough, we are able to make bold and good decisions with a clear mind. Security comes in many aspects, health, social interactions and self improvement, finances, resources, etc. (Let me know if you think of others.) It’s not because we are not brave or not capable enough. It’s because we don’t feel secure enough.
A dependence on material things will very likely make us feel insecure and want more. Possessing things or abusing substances might help us have a hit of dopamine which gives us pleasure and reward for a short period of time but it doesn’t solve the problem when dopamine decreases. It turns into a vicious cycle if you don’t do anything about it. So, how do we help ourselves to feel more secure and conquer more difficulties? Instead of getting more things from the outside, why don’t we replenish our inner self? Stop counting the things we don’t have and start counting the things we have. Surround ourselves with people who empower us, not deplete us. Either a good partner or no partner. There’s no third option. Take care of our body and nourish our mind. Learning something new definitely helps. The best is to grow with our people together!
People like us do things like this.
Relationships, I realized social interactions are so important, especially in the past two years, as I met more like-minded people online/ offline. Growing up as an introvert, it was just easier to do things alone when I didn’t feel understood much. I thought I was the weird one with too many thoughts. The truth is there are so many people like us and we are the best help for each other. (But first, we need to find each other.) So many of you shared your similar experiences with me and said yes, yes to what I believe in. You empower me so much to be my authentic self and I want to serve you the same. I thank myself for cutting off people who wanted me to stay in the herd and threatened to dismantle my peace of mind because of their own fear. I’m not cruel. I’m brave. I finally feel understood and connected.
Self-identity
In order for us to feel comfortable within our own skin we need to know that what’s happening inside our minds and bodies makes sense. We learn that our thoughts and feelings makes sense through interactions with others. When we express ourselves and the other person shows a sincere curiosity to understand our perspective and communicates that understanding, we get to internalize the idea that we are understand-able.
When we feel understood,
Our identity is confirmed.
We exist.
We belong.
We are part of something bigger than ourselves.
We are accepted and empowered.
We understand ourselves better.
We are shielded from depression.
We are lucky we can still make choices.
Now,
imagine you are a homeless loner with no one to talk to, nothing to look forward to. Spending your last bit of money seems the best and only choice to feel bit relived until you wake up to face it again. People walking by think you’re a loser because they don’t care to know your story. Addiction is not the fault of substance or the weak mind of the addict, but loneliness.
Embrace the difference
There’s a group of people who are helping poor lonely people by empathically understanding. They empower the poor to find hope of light in their life. Taiwan Dream City Building Organization (臺灣夢想城鄉營造協會) is a non-profit organization based in Wanhua, Taipei. They empower the homeless by accompanying and training. Three main programs are Fragile Art Studio, Woodwork Workshop and tour guide. Their goal is to help people who are who are desperate due to poverty to rebuild their interpersonal relationships, get out of loneliness, and find their hope in life. They also connect the poor, local networks and young volunteers to form a network of interpersonal connections for mutual learning and growth, hoping to bring more people in to promote the "coexistence" and "community" of the poor and the society.
About Fragile Art Studio
It’s an art educational program for the poor, and it is also a place where people with different life experiences can accompany and learn from each other. The poor who came here experienced different vulnerabilities and frustrations in their lives. The common thing was that they didn’t have enough resources to deal with their wound caused by long-term poverty or after experiencing failures. Fragile Art Studio encourages to find the courage to talk about their failures through art. This is the key for someone who can find hope after he is free from despair. Here, whether the painting is good or not is not the point. The most important is to connect with ourselves again, see values in ourselves again and connect with others through art. They believe everyone can be powerful. They just have not been found or seen in difficult situations.
I find painting trees so meditative and freeing because every tree is unique. They don’t need to be perfect but still perfect together.
Their links below (in Mandarin). Let’s share kindness to empower each other together.
Lastly, I want to share the affirmations on my wall in case someone needs it.
I’m growing into who I am and out of what others want me to be.
I will continue to expand from the things that threaten to dismantle my peace of mind.
I’m doing my best to make space for acceptance and understanding - even when I’m rejected.
I forgive myself for shrinking in hops of being accepted by people who weren’t built to understand me.
I’m a work in progress. I will continue to unravel and make space for ease as I learn my way and walk my path.
Thank you for giving me the chance to share with you by reading this far.
Till next time!